How do men experience shame?

To answer that question let’s set the table by using Brene’ Brown’s description of how men experience shame in her book Daring Greatly.

• Shame is failure. At work. On the football field. In your marriage. In bed. With money. With your children. It doesn’t matter — shame is failure.
• Shame is being wrong. Not doing it wrong, but feeling wrong.
• Shame is a sense of being defective.
• Shame happens when people think you’re soft. It’s degrading and shaming to be seen as anything but tough.
• Revealing any weakness is shaming. Basically, shame is weakness.
• Showing fear is shameful. You can’t show fear. You can’t be afraid —no matter what.
• Shame is being seen as “the guy you can shove up against the lockers.”
• Our worst fear is being criticized or ridiculed — either one of these is extremely shaming.
• So how is shame showing up in Fantasy Football…

How do I experience shame in Fantasy Football?

• If I lose then I feel like a failed for the week.
• If my record is a losing record then I feel like I am failing.
• If I pick the wrong player to start then I “feel” wrong.
• If I feel like a loser then I have a sense of being a defective manager.
• If fellow managers are heckling me then I feel soft if I don’t respond with heckling.
• If I don’t know everything there is to know about the game of fantasy football then I’m considered weak.
• If I am unsure or uncertain about anything related to the game then I’m showing fear — I can’t do that.
• If I am the target for bullying then I am the guy you can shove up against the lockers.
• And if I am being criticized or ridiculed then I feel inferior.

It’s time to quit playing Fantasy Football or time to play it in a shame-free way!?!?!